Halloween that keeps on giving

Halloween just keeps on coming and coming and it's not even here yet! We went to Santana Row to trick or treat, and I loved it. The kids were done 1 hour into it, and really just wanted to watch "Andy" (a local kids performer), but I thought it was fun to walk in and out of the stores and get FREE candy! If only Anthropologie handed out free stuff for the moms!

Then, there was Maddie's preschool party... and this was right before she left:


Concentrating hard on being a cat!

Da Da!!!

Tonight we have our church trick or treat... and is it Halloween yet??

Tomatos out...and something else in!

We've had a great tomato harvest this year, but they are just sitting there, not really doing much. So, it's out with them... and in with something else! What should we plant??

Here is my little helper yesterday morning:





And here is the out of control tomato haven that is now GONE! Now we only have 1 lonely eggplant plant.
Are there vegetables you recommend for the winter months?

A little Halloween Party

Yesterday, a great friend and I threw our second annual Halloween party for the kids. It was much better than last year for some reason! We paired it down to the essentials, and cut out the non essentials. The biggest hit was the "spider web" which basically was all the kids sitting around in a circle throwing the black yarn to each other until we made a spider web... and then put a spider in the middle and tried to balance him, and then tried to throw him out. I wish I had a pic, but I basically put my camera down for most of the party. Bummer.

Here are the pics that I did take:

Maddie was a cat, and Emilie the mouse. Unfortunately, as the day went on, the ears came off, the paws, the vest... so they turned into kids wearing black :) But, they were cute anyways!

We played this game where the kids had to carry the candy corns across the floor with spoons... I think Emi got the handle of it...

But, then figured out that was a stupid game, when she could get on the floor and eat them while mom wasn't looking (or she thought she wasn't!). Smart girl.

Very serious competition.

The costumes were pretty awesome!


Lots of bats this year! Or batmans. Hey, are you looking at my batsuit?

I'm going to try and take a pic of the girls with all of their costume pieces together... we'll see if it happens!

Good Things

Where has October gone? Ah! Steve came and went to Berlin, Steve's mom came and visited, a couple of close friends are almost due or had their first children, my dad came and visited, Emilie is now kind of talking!! Lots of good things :)

Emilie's favorite word is "no, Noooooo, and Nooo way." Although it is kind of annoying, I have to admit I think it's really cute. Now she's also nodding and getting really excited about life around her. It is a really special time when they start blossoming into little kids and out of the baby stage. I'm trying to appreciate each moment because I know I'm going to be 80 years old soon! (ok not that fast!)

I've committed to read all of the complete works of CS Lewis. He is about my favorite author of all time. Right now I'm reading "The Problem of Pain." Although it almost takes me 5 minutes to read a page sometimes (because the thoughts are so deep and provoking), it has been a HUGE upper with the passing of my mom and some clarification and additions to thoughts that I've had. Anyway. love him.

I finally signed up for Facebook. I guess I've never done it because I didn't see the draw... and was afraid of the waste of time. But- I like it. I'm not a complete lover of it (spending hours on it), but I've reconnected with a lot of friends that I haven't seen in a while, and my favorite thing about it is their photos. If it could be just PHOTOS, that would be awesome. Maybe I could invent that and be a billionare :)

Today we went to a farm near our house to "pick" some pumpkins. I think we have our fair share at the moment.But, here are some quick picks:





Steve's mom came to visit last weekend and it was soooo nice. She let me take an afternoon off- and I went swimming, got a massage and had lunch with a friend. It was such a nice break. She and the girls hit it off the entire weekend- especially Emilie. Up until now, she was basically scared of everyone, and would cry if you got 2 inches from her. But, I think the winds are changing. She loved her... and we miss her already!

Going though old pics...

Steve has been out of town, and I have really enjoyed just being with the girls. Driving to preschool, watching swimming lessons, going to the park, talking with friends... has been my highlights of this week. It has been so therapeutic and they give me so much energy. They really are one of the biggest blessings of my life.

Every night, I've been trying to organize. Yesterday, I organized my closet and finally threw out those shirts that have been in the "but, I might wear them once" pile. I really won't wear them- so there is more use for them at GoodWill.

Tomorrow is the girls' closet. A bigger nightmare, but someone's got to do it.

Today, I started organizing photos. I have photos everywhere. And, you think I would have organized them in a better way, but no. They are everywhere and it is going to be an enormous headache...but a huge bonus is reliving some past moments. I never posted one of our last days in Paris.

We went to Disneyland Paris- which was far from the happiest place on earth. If you ever want to go there, please talk to me first. It's not worth it.

But- there was a memorable gem in the day. Although it took 2 hours to get to her, Maddie met Cinderella. Before I had kids, I wouldn't blink once at this, but when you have a young girl... this is pretty big. She was nervous/excited/couldn't control her emotions...she wasn't quite sure what to say to her. But, this is how the events unfolded:

Cinderella talked with her for seriously 5 minutes. I was really interested to hear what Maddie had to say. But, when she came back I said "Maddie, what did she say, what did you guys talk about?" She just stood there star glazed. "Maddie what did you talk about?" Silence. "Maddie, Maddie, Maddie?"

Really cute.

No easy way to say it

It has been a while since I've posted... and I really don't know how to start. But, you have to start somewhere, right?

The day after coming back from France, I heard that my mom was really sick... and I immediately booked a trip to Miami where she was with her family. A couple of days later she passed away.

The details of those last days were horrible... and really, the last 10 years were pretty bad as well. She suffered a lot from a combination of mental and physical disease... and I know that she is in a better place...without the suffering of this world. But, it is still devastatingly hard.

Luckily, death has been something so foreign to me. I really knew nothing of what it would feel like. I never thought I would lose my mom so young, or that she would die so young. It really does seem like a dream.

The day of her death, I couldn't stop crying. But, because there was so much "busy work" to do, the next couple of days I walked around calling funerals, signing papers, choosing inscriptions... trying to be helpful, but not registering it all. It is a surreal experience.

I know that this is going to be a long process...but it is so sad. I miss her calling on the phone. I read her handwriting on all of my children's books. I hear Maddie asking about Grandma... I talk to my dad who is so very lonely. It is very hard.

But, and there is always a but, right? But... there has been silver linings. And many tender blessings. And, an opening in my soul that I have never had.

I do believe this is why we are here on this earth. To learn and to grow... and sometimes you can't grow without being pushed to your outer limits. Close friends have been sending me quotes or articles to read which have been extremely uplifting. Here is my favorite today:

“Just when all seems to be going right, challenges often come in multiple doses simultaneously. When those trials are not consequences of your disobedience, they are evidence that the Lord feels you are prepared to grow more (see Proverbs 3:11-12). He therefore gives you experiences that stimulate growth, understanding, and compassion which polish you for your everlasting benefit. To get you from where you are to where He wants you to be requires a lot of stretching, and that generally entails discomfort and pain . . . .Your Father in Heaven and His Beloved Son loves you perfectly. They would not require you to experience a moment more of difficulty than is absolutely needed for your personal benefit or for that of those you love.” Richard G. Scott

Anyway, I really didn't understand what people meant when they said... just take it a day at a time, or an hour at a time. Now I do. I'm taking it at that pace.

110 euro shirts, pizza, Chateau de Vincennes, our anniversary, and an organ concert

Yesterday was our 11th anniversary- wowzars. Like everything, it feels like it has been so short, and so long! But- it is super cool that we were able to be in Paris to celebrate.

Steve and the girls went out and got flowers as a surprise and picked out their favorite bouquets. It was very cute :) Thanks Steve!

For the morning, we wandered around our neighborhood, played at park, and window shopped. We have been discussing "redoing" Steve's wardrobe a la "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy," so we started looking for some dress shirts. There were lots of amazing shirts, but for $110-130 euro each, we couldn't stomach it. Maybe when we get back :)

This picture is of our favorite pizza place. We don't have very many hours left to devour it, so we couldn't help ourselves.

And, of course, some more macaroons and strawberry heaven.

For the afternoone, we decided to tour Chateau de Vincennes, a 14th and 17th century castle. In order to get in, you have to cross the enormous moat and drawbridge, which was super cool. I just can't imagine living in a time where there were moats and castles like this... so different from today. The grounds were gorgeous- we saw 2 bride/grooms followed by their photographers. Maddie loved the brides so much- she wanted me to take photos of her! Here she is:

We planned on staying there much longer and going to the lakes, but it was getting so cold- and I didn't have a sweater :( So, we called it a day and headed home on the bus which took a long time, but it is so relaxing to sit on a vehicle after walking everywhere for 1 month :)

Later that night, Steve and I went on a date to celebrate our 11 years at a cute little restaurant his coworker in Germany recommended. We had some delicious food and good conversation :) It was also pretty entertaining b/c we were crammed into some seats right by an Italian couple who were practicing their English with each other... and were saying some pretty hilarious things. ("It was a pleasure waking up with you this morning.") I was dying.

Today we woke up, went to church, and cooked. (Typical, right?) Today's menu was Kartoffelpuffer! Isn't that the funniest word ever?? When Steve and Chris came back from Berlin they told us about this amazing potato potato pancake, and of course we had to make them!

They were very yummy- and Chris made homemade applesauce, red currant jelly and peach marmolade. Wow. Very very good.

I have been wanting to hear an organ concert at the Notre Dame... and since this is our last Sunday, we had to go.

The composer was very into loud and low resonating notes, so although it wasn't "angelic," it was perfect for the surroundings of the Notre Dame.

The girls did pretty well... except when the organist would hit those low notes and Maddie would put her hands on her ears :)


An after concert photo shot. Tomorrow we're going to Disneyland Paris, so came home early to relax. (We rented Sneakers and Chris made virgin Mojitos).